Does anyone know how to get in touch with John Tesh?

I hate John Tesh. In that David Hasselhoff kind of way. You know what I mean. He has that smarmy look to his face that says..... I think I am great. He looks like a hairy dude too (much like the Hoff). He has always annoyed me. Not sure why? When he was on Entertainment Tonight, hated him. When he tried to be a piano playing superstar, hated him. He just has that "I'm talented enough to be famous, but not talented enough for you to like me, so I'll just be annoying and cling to every opportunity to be in the spotlight" kind of way. (Disclaimer: Dude has more talent than me for sure, but I am not annoyingly famous....just annoying)

So, am I blogging just to share my feelings on Tesh and the Hoff? No.

Recently, John Tesh has become the second man in my life. I guess I have now developed a love-hate relationship with him. The Teshmiester has become the little whisper in my hubby's ear that finally gets him to do the things I am nagging him about for YEARS. And this has given me yet ANOTHER reason to hate on the Tesh.

Blake commutes 25 miles each way, and in the car listens to the radio. Evidently, he is inflicting the John Tesh show on my poor helpless radio. However, like a kid finding a sucker on the ground, he just can't help but pick up the goodies. He'll walk in the door nearly everyday with some random John Tesh fact.

"John Tesh says....." is a frequent comment in our home. Often, it is stuff I have been saying for years. (you know the stuff you tell your husband "they say you should/shouldn't....which is followed from the husband with, "well who told you that?", and "Who is THEY?????" Then the information is promptly discounted and discarded)But hey, give a man an annoying voice and a radio show and the husband will listen. Guess the boobs (mine not Tesh's) don't have as much power as they once did. Seriously, you'd think Tesh was Oprah or something. (Oh, and i dislike her MORE than the Teshter)

So, my question to you all, if I have to listen to the "John Tesh Says...." constantly, can't I at least reap some of the benefits. I'd like for John Tesh to list the following on his radio show:

1. Husbands should always offer to do housework. It makes for a happier home and wife.

2. Don't rag on your wife at how dirty the car is. They're your five heathens too. She wasn't the only one there when they were made, and shouldn't be the only one having to pry dried on tootsie pops from the leather in the van. And NO, she does not know what the mysterious liquid is in the cup-holder. But, John Tesh says you should offer to clean it.

3.Don't ask if you have clean underwear. Look at the GIANT pile in your bathroom. None of your clothes have magically sprouted little underwear-legs. Chances are, unless clothes have started magically replicating, those are the same dirty underwear you didn't take to the dirty clothes yesterday. John Tesh says, if you aren't going to wash them, AT LEAST take them to the dirty clothes.

4. If you love your wife, don't make her watch old Night Rider reruns on the RTN. (See comments above on her feelings about the Hoff.) John Tesh says torturing her with one 80's has-been is enough, and he is taking on that role.

5. ALWAYS let your wife sleep in on the weekends. John Tesh would.

6. When in the car together, she can hear the radio, so you really don't have to repeat what John Tesh JUST SAID. She may just be choosing to ignore it.

7. Since said wife gave up chocolate, she may be(ok IS) rather grumpy. (Yes, this is in addition to her normal state of pleasant grumpiness) You should do something special for her. A giant chocolate candy bar would be nice, but cruel. VERY cruel. John Tesh says skip the chocolate and go for cash. She likes that too.

8. She really likes good Mexican food. She really hates cooking. Mix those two together, and what do you get? Pick up take out at the Jose's at the interstate exit. (She can probably give you the call-in number) John Tesh says this will score major points and might lead to a good night. (unless, of course, you count the byproducts of ingesting re-fried beans and jalapenos') Though I am sure john tesh has a cure all tip to get rib of gas (mine and yours).

9. When said gas attacks at bedtime....it is not polite to fan it to your wife's face. Nor is it polite to hold her head under covers (in some states that is probably spouse abuse....so says the Tesh). The polite thing to do, as per Tesh ...if you were to ask him....is to go to the bathroom and rip 'em.

and finally

10. Tesh says that sometimes it is better to pretend you don't know where you heard something. Anytime you say to the wife, "john tesh says....." She stops listening. While the Tesh-man has offered TONS of helpful bits of information over the past months, he is really annoying. The man can't seriously think we think he knows all that. Hello, can you say staff researchers? Pretend the dog told you. It'll get you further.

So, unless John can get my husband to stop leaving his socks and shoes everywhere, convince him to clean the kitchen from top to bottom, wash and fold all the laundry, and scrub the boys bathroom (seriously....3 boys, one toilet, GROSS), cook dinner, clean the van, and rub my feet; I really have no use for him. The show is called : Music and Intelligence for YOUR life.....not for Your Wife. Let's keep it that way!