Blog MIA and a classic story.

I have been taking a blogging holiday. Or not...I've just been so busy, this has not been on my radar.
I do, however, have an excellent story to tell.
For quite a while, April (my sister), Yahnira (my best friend) and I have planned to go to Wrapper's Delight. It's a 36 hour Scrapbooking Crop. Heaven to a Scrapbooker. No kids. Uninterrupted time. Chocolate. Scrapbooking. Make and Takes. Games. Prizes. Fun!

So, we head up to Birmingham early Friday morning. April was having a rough week. The water heater decided to go out in their house on Thursday, and we were supposed to be staying there. No biggie. We ended up getting a hotel room. Hot showers are a must when you are staying up until 2 am. Friday was fun. I actually got stuff done, which for me is amazing. Usually, I am too busy running my mouth, and accomplish very little. I also had an advantage in that i was alone on one side of a table while April and Yahnira had to share a side. I guess I got lucky. Anyway, all day long, they pulled door prizes. WE DIDNT WIN. I mean, there are only like 62 names in the bucket and they couldnt find ours. April eventually won towards the evening. So, Saturday was going to be our day.

Saturday, we are having a great time. I think maybe overtired? Getting into this game. They have these sheets of paper with sponsors names on them taped to the floor around the room. When they play the theme song, you are supposed to run to one of those squares.We'd been doing this for almost 2 days now. We knew where all the squares were. Had paths mapped out to the ones around our area. We were right by the Accucut (big die cut machine for you non scrapbookers) machine, so often there were extra people in our area, forcing us to find alternate squares and routes.

This is how my luck had been going. For an entire day I stood on the same dang square. The time a lady gets there before, IT WINS. So, we are playing. Yahnira had nearly taken a fall, and determined, since she was having NO luck, she was not going to endanger her life any further and was going to refrain from running like an dog after the mailman for these prizes. I should have taken her cue.

Picture it: the music (which of course had to be Rappers Delight for the theme song since that was the name of the crop) plays. I go to stand, and turn to my right at the same time. Some one (me) had placed my obnoxiously large scrapbook bag on the floor just to the front right of my chair. As I turn, my foot is caught under my chair, behind the front right leg. I can feel it, I am going down and it is not going to be a gracious fall.

I try to salvage my standing, and attempt to step over my gargantuan bad, but to no avail. Instead, my shin scrapes across the top of the bag, my right leg comes free at just that moment. Launching me like a spit-ball out of a straw. I go gliding across the isle, head first into a large pink tackle box. My bag erupts across the floor like a volcano, and I come to a landing, skidding across the carpet on my left knee, right elbow and forehead. It was like a game to twister played by an airplane in a crash landing. I can only imagine the sight it must have been as my delicate (fat) frame came billowing gently (crashing violently) across the isle (through my stuff and some lady's rather large and rather pink GIANT HARD PLASTIC tackle box).

As I skidded to a stop, I took inventory of the damage. One bag, totally emptied across the floor. Check. Major Rug burn knee despite wearing jeans. Check. Pretty nice raspberry on elbow through long sleeve shirt. Check. Bruised forehead from tackle box across the isle. Check. Shattered pride and utter humiliation. CHECK CHECK.

I am laughing, but it is one of those "if i dont laugh i am going to cry and then it will only draw more attention to me, so i am going to laugh with all the other people who are laughing at me. Please make them stop laughing so i can quit laughing, cuz i might crylaugh and that will be quite ugly. Then they will be able to say, did you see the lady trip because she didnt know how to stand and now she is crylaughing and she looks like a freak." So I laughed. Everyone did. Some people checked to see if I was ok. Which I ofcourse laughed (as stated above) and said ofcourse I am ok. And you know, I still didnt win. Though, I dont know if I could have made it to the front of the room at that point. I was still picking up my scrapbooking supplies and pride off the floor.

there is one thing i can just about guarantee if you go somewhere with me. I will either say something really stupid, do something really stupid, or attempt a combination of doing and saying something stupid. As I stood up and dusted myself off, I realize I had just fallen big time in a room full of 60 something people. I think (though I am not quite sure) it is a new record for me. I think this is probably my 2nd best large group clutzy moment, following behind my bicycle boardwalk crotch crash of 4th grade. You really dont want to know that story. but there is a campground full of people from Saint Joseph's peninsula in Florida that can tell it. I'll just say I have no coordination, and should not attempt to ride a steep ramp that makes a 90 degree turn on a bike. I met a wooden support pole to the boardwalk banister and thought it was a firemans pole. I still have a scar. Can't show you, but I do. (yeah, sorry about the TMI there....readers and former guests of the campground...)

Anyway, I have added two new scars to my poor 29 year old body (i dare anyone to correct my age!). It is 11 days later, and I STILL have a nasty scab on my knee. I had to take motrin for a week I was so sore and bruised up! Seriously, who knew scrapbooking....no standing up and walking could be so dangerous.....??????